Friday, May 14, 2004

Dave Grohl gets bitch-slapped.

One of my favorite music critics Sasha Frere Jones (Slate, The New Yorker) fucks Dave Grohl up. Dizamn. Check it:

S/FJ: ROCKISMALISM: " Should I ever be asked to guest lecture on the subject of rockism, and I can't convince Mark Sinker to do everyone a favor and take the gig, I will hand the following clipping to the youth. They need read no further than this passage from Dave Grohl's Playlist, originally in the New York Times Arts & Leisure Section:

'BRITNEY SPEARS -- Take it from me, the airplane videos get 'em every time. Long gone are the days of Britney's high school pep-rally dance routines. Proving once again that she will not be outdone when it comes to pop sleaze, she's back with ''Toxic'' (Jive), four minutes of ''Showgirls'' meets 007. Here, you get three flavors to choose from: Britney the blonde, Britney the brunette and Britney the redhead. Without being nasty enough to really cause a stir, she manages to make out with about 27 guys in the course of a few minutes, although it's hard to keep track, what with all the hair dye going on. Oh yeah, then there's the song. Kudos to the mad genius who finally wrote the musical equivalent of brainwash. Deprogram me, now, please.'

The day Dave Grohl writes any 'brainwash' as focused and tough as 'Toxic,' he may actually convert someone who's never heard Nirvana. The day he gets over his 'female desire = sluttiness' problem, we'll take his face off the dart board. (She kisses about three or four guys, Dave, if memory serves, and what are you worried about in the first place?) And when he realizes that parodies are fair game for everybody, he will become, on that day, a man."

Brrrrrrrrrrrr.

(For further bitch slapping, check out another great crit, Michaelangelo Matos, on Stephin Merritt: "[T]he Magnetic Fields is boring music for older siblings [of suburban kids] who fancy themselves intellectual because they read half a magazine piece by David Foster Wallace." Yeouch. Merritt got the smackdown after he called OutKast's music "innocuous party music for suburban teenagers.")

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