Reason #804,243 why I love the Wonk.

I read this shit and my heart goes pitter-pat. Wonkette on Bush at the Unity Conference:

Yet, as usual, Bush did have moments of true lyricism:

We actually misnamed the War on Terror. It ought to be the Struggle Against Ideological Extremists Who Do Not Believe in Free Societies Who Happen to Use Terror as a Weapon To Try To Shape The Conscience Of The Free World.

We're sure that focus grouped well. In fact, we hear that the only reason they didn't go with it was that Toby Keith was having trouble making it scan. No, really: It's one thing to "misspeak," which everyone does, it's another thing to be so drenched in flop sweat that you start channeling David Foster Wallace, which usually only Dave Eggers does.