Monday, July 10, 2006

Thank you, Michaelangelo Matos.

Mr. Matos,

Not only do I enjoy reading your music criticism, I need to send you propers for sending me over to Rich Juzwiak's blog FourFour. His seventy minute New Jack Swing mix has made this day bearable. Bobby Brown and SWV and Tony! Toni! Toné! and ABC and "Mowtonphilly"? Please. It makes me want to dig out the Z. Cavariccis my Mom bought me at The Buckle and go make out with some girl at the RollerDome. (I hope I'm not alone here. I imagine if one was born between the years 1975 and 1983, it'll hold true for them too. I hope.)

Plus the accompanying commentary is brilliant. A sample:
  • But what I hate the most is the whole "Everybody should be making love shit," because: FUCK YOU, SPINDERELLA. DO NOT TELL ME HOW TO FUCK.
  • Tevin Campbell recites a limerick in "Round and Round." FACT.
  • Can you believe Michael Jackson released a song called "In the Closet"?!?! So that "something" about you baby that makes him want to give it to you is a penis, right? Too easy, Mike!
  • "I Like the Way" wasn't playing during my first French kiss (with a girl, of course), but it was popular around that time (late spring of '91) and it came on the radio soon after we dribbled all in each other. FACT.

It's rich, yo. Rich.
Remember when people unironically liked Bobby Brown? I seriously loved his theme song to Ghosbusters II* a lot. A lot, a lot.

Those were the days.

Your pal,


* Just in case you need your memory jogged:
Too hot to handle, too cold to hold
They're called the Ghostbusters and they're in control
Had 'em throwin' a party for a bunch of children
While all the while the slime was under the building
So they packed up their group, got a grip, came equipped
Grabbed they proton packs off their back and they split
Found about Vigo, the master of evil
Try to battle my boys? That's not legal
(Oh-we-oh) They're in control
(Oh-we-oh) Y-Y-Ya know it


At 3:54 PM, Blogger Tim said...

That's the best Bobby Brown song ever. I will hear no arguments to the contrary. None.

At 4:33 PM, Blogger girish said...

I happened to spend the weekend driving around, with CD burns of these two mixes playing in the car. Amazing.

Ralph Tresvant's "Sensitivity" is a beauty.

Shows you how unironic I am: since I purchased Bobby Brown's DON'T BE CRUEL way back in 1989, I have played it religiously and frequently, without tiring of it, for almost 20 years.
"Roni" sounds awesome, to this day.

At 11:36 PM, Blogger Joshua said...

Kind of like how Vanilla Ice's best song is "Ninja Rap" from the masterpiece Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret Of The Ooze.

"YO! It’s the green machine -- Gonna rock the town without bein’ seen
Have you ever seen a turtle Get Down? -- Slammin’ Jammin’ to the new swing sound
Yeah, everybody let’s move -- Vanilla is here with the new Jack Groove
Gonna rock, and roll this place -- With the power of the ninja turtle bass
Iceman, ya know I’m not playin’"

At 9:46 AM, Blogger Tim said...

With the chorus, "Go Ninja Go Ninja Go!" This led to the semi-unfortunate Knicks theme song "Go New York Go New York Go!" But, they were at least good when they had that song, so maybe it wasn't so bad after all.

At 4:10 PM, Anonymous Rich said...

Thanks for the shout! And the days of loving Bobby Brown unironically actually never ended in my world. "Roni" is among my Top 5 songs of all time, period.


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