I'd like to introduce y'all to one of the most exciting blogs I've found in ages. That would beBadonicus' BADLANDS
Why do I love this blog so much?
1. He hates that his Christian brothers try to pretend that racism isn't sanctioned by the Bible. He is on a Jesus-lovin' quest to spread the word of God... and that word is God hates "racemixing."
2. He calls TV "the Jewbox."
3. This entry: Britney Spears: Faggot
4. He's an accomplished playwright. Here's an excerpt from his latest piece, A Bowtie in the Sun
In a dirty, cramped living room, three adult Negroes are conversating. The furniture is sparse and decrepit, save for a giant plasma TV on the wall, which is the focus of attention of 9 or 10 small children. As the children watch TV, Melvin X explains to Tyrone and Urethra the way things are.
Melvin X: See-dat's what I'm talkin' 'bout! Da white man is keeping you down. It ain't yo' fault you can't get ahead. It's all part "Da Plan". Dey's afraid of us, and dat's why dey put the chemicals in KFC to sterilize da black man.
Urethra: Sterlize da black man? Watchu talkin' bout? I gots 10 chirrens, and Tyrone is babydaddy to 5 o' dem. Dat's almost half. Don't sound like he be too sterlized..
Tyrone: Shut up, Reethy! I ain't tryin' to hear dat! Go get me another 40 and let Melvin speak. He makin' a lot o' sense. Go 'head, Melvin. Don't pay her no mind. Where'd you learn all dis stuff, anyways?
X: From Minister Farrakhan. He tell it like it eeyuz! You and Urethra need to start listenin' to his tapes and readin' his newspaper-it'll open your eyes to what da white man has done to our peoples. Like da crack epidemic dat's destroying da hood-you know who done dat, right?
X: Da CIA! Dey been pushin' crack to enslave us, to keep us down. Dey knows dey ain't no holdin' us back once we unite and fight da honkies together, so they flooded black neighborhoods with crack and herrin.
T: I's startin' to get mad, Melvin. Real mad. Dose honkies is some evil mofos.
Urethra (handing Tyrone a large bottle of malt liquor): Da CIA? You straight trippin' now Melvin. Unless you cousin Ray Ray in da CIA-he da only one sellin' crack on our corner.
T: DAMN YOU REETHY! I done tol' you onced to shut yo' mouf! Melvin here tryin' to speak da troof, an' you keep talkin' sideways out yo' neck! Don't make me go upside yo hayid! Go on Melvin. We needs to hear dis.
X: So dey get us all hooked on drugs, and den dey use da media to portray black mens as violent criminals. Den it's almo' impossible fo' a brutha to get a decent payin' job.
T: I hear dat. Wit' all dese negative stereotypes, it ain't no wonder I can't get no job.
U: Nigga, please! Da only reason you can't no job is you just too damn lazy to GET YO BLACK ASS OUT DA BED!
There is a long silence, as Tyrone glares at Urethra. Finally, he gets out of his chair.
5. The final reason this blog is the shit: the Keebler elves are responsible for gay marriage.
"Faggot marriage isn't the bastard child of the Jewish media praising anything that moves us away from our forebears' beliefs as "progress", and reviling anyone who retains too many of those beliefs as a "hater". No, none of that had anything to do with faggot marriage, Virginia. Ya wanna know how we got gay marriage, Virginia? Well, you never would believe where that homo marriage comes from-it's baked by little elves in a hollow tree."